Freedom in ignorance

Do you ever wonder the liberation you would get while living in complete ignorance? Like an animal? My domesticated cats and dogs seem to be doing alright. 

Of course to appreciate that sense of freedom would require a conscious understanding of ignorance and knowledge to begin with. Thus not like an animal at all. 

Adulting, or becoming an adult is fraught with so much insecure and negative connotations. You are now responsible for all your actions, bailing is a temporary escape. 

How do you file an income tax? Which investment options are best for earning dividends or retirement? Should I call first? When is enough? Does loyalty lie more with your parents or with your spouse? 

You never learn exactly what to do as you descend into adulthood. I say descend because we gradually lose our innocence. Commitment, obligation, duty and responsibility are some of the things that fell on my unwary head like a ton of bricks one day. People use to say I’m mature for my age. Does that mean I’m cynical and jaded?

In a few decades perhaps I’ll look back at these moments of self doubt and smile wistfully at the memory. But for now it just feels overwhelming.

At least I don’t have kids. I don’t know how my parents did it.

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